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 Post subject: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 7:48 am 
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No secrets for me in MW
No secrets for me in MW

Joined: Fri Jan 16, 2009 6:41 am
Posts: 455
Location: Palm Desert, Southern California.
Recently I've taken to writing a whole lot of short horror stories.. and reading creepy pastas, and playing a lot of horror games. I have an extremely overactive imagination and after spending 4 days mulling over and editing and deciding on a direction and story-line to follow this is what I have come up with. I understand there is no biography there.. however it is being written and edited. I just have a final in 7 hours I am studying for and a 8 page paper on Popular Sovereignty due in 13 hours that I have not written a single word of. So I must apologize but I promise yo it will be finished by the end of the weekend. I also must say so far I'm really proud of what I've come up with I think it's really unique and comprises of some extraordinarily creepy (to me) ideas that make my skin crawl (:

I do have to say I had to combat the undead stupidity clause, but please moderators, let me know if I can get away with more or less with my medium skill please, or if I should fix the strengths of the two, because I was completely lost in the scaling of their strength, however I'm intent on keeping them for the sake of the development of the character, let me know if I must fumble around in the dark for a while longer or if I can live with this (:

ALso, do items that go for 1g originally on the market sell back for 1g or for 0g? I wasn't too sure so I kept both the robe and the denim pants, however they are for the most part unnecessary and I would prefer to sell them to reducemy debt as it amounts to an extra 2g that I could add.. reducing my debt to -5 gold.
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Name: Edwin DeVille

Class: Psionicist

Race: Undead - Human Shape

Disadvantages:
--Stupid: Stupid, not dumb like the orcs. Like, we're talking less intelligent than a brick here people. (Negated by skill)
--Slow and Clumsy: As a result of their partially decomposed body nature, not only are Fleshies stupid... they're also slow and clumsy. They have less agility and dexterity than most races.


Advantages:
--Bloodless: Fleshies do not have blood and, thusly, cannot bleed.
--Dead Warrior: It is believed that these undead were animated from the body of a once great warrior. As such, they have amazing stamina, they're unbelivably strong, and VERY durable.


Alignment: Neutral

Inventory: Robe, Reinforced Denim Pants, Glaive

Gold: -8

Pet: none

Specials/Spells List: Telekinesis, Mind Probe, Psychic Bolt

Skills List: Strong of Body, Strong of mind; Sixth Sense,

Biography:



Physical Description:

--Height: 5’10”

--Weight: 170 lb

--Eyes: No eyes.. although his eyelids have been cut off, his dark circles that are his eye sockets give off the impression that he is -always- watching you, staring into your soul, seeking what wrong-doing you have done in the past.

--Hair: None, long since fallen, pulled, or otherwise mowed right off his head.

--Skin: Black, rotten enough to look gross and give off a fetid smell, but not rotten enough to be falling off the bone, fungus has grown, helping to contribute to the dark tone of his skin and the decomposing smell.

--Special Markings: No eyes, stitched mouth.. he’s a true creature of horror.. there are no special markings as they simply dissolve in the rotten flesh or have been grown over by mold and fungus.

--Special Traits: Edwin does not speak. His mouth has been sewn shut, and you can see the stitches there. Instead his head simply ‘looks’ in your direction and you instantly understand why he is in your presence. There is no escape. There is no end. There is only justice for the wrongs you have done. The ghosts of your past are still very much alive and lead him to your door.

--Dress: His robe and jeans are worn as normal.. torn, ripped, weary from travel, they don’t resemble clothes that have been recently purchased. However, they do the job they were intended well.

Spells Description:

Telekinesis: The psionicist uses psychic power to control an object. This class skill allows them to manipulate and control an object from a distance, so long as it is not being held by another person. While only limited by the mental strength of the caster, the speed in which telekinesis can move the target object is based directly on the object's size and weight. The bigger and heavier it is, the slower it will move. 5x per battle

Mind Probe: The psionicist uses psychic power to read the thoughts of their opponent. This allows them to understand the nature of and anticipate an oncoming attack. However, the amount of information they can gather is limited... as the feedback from taking in too much at one time can, quite literally, kill them. This spell can be used instantly. [Medium/Instant/Psionics] 2x per battle

Psychic Bolt: The psionicist creates and fires a small orb of telekinetic force aimed at their opponent. It hits like a fist-sized stone, dealing a small amount of blunt-type damage. This spell takes only a small amount of time to cast. [Weak/Fast/Psionics] 4x per battle

Skills Description:

The Sixth Sense:
As he has been collecting souls for their misdeeds, a sixth sense has grown to take over Edwin’s sight.. He no longer can ‘see’ the person with color and warmth.. instead he sees with your emotion.. while he can barely see you at first, the more anxietic, fearful, worried, and rage-ful you get, the more clear you become to him. This also scales in a radius around him, the further away, the less likely he is to see you. Even if you are absolutely terrified, shaking in your pants, urinating on yourself, if you are standing further away than he would have cause to see you as a normal person, you will still only barely appear and it will give him a much less likely chance to see you. However if you are very close to him even if you are not terrified, he will be able to see you. Obviously in a crowd of people, by the nature of his appearance and the rumors of what he does, he will not be able to see you. If fighting multiple opponents he will have a hard time distinguishing who is who unless you speak. You must also be in what would be considered his normal field of view in order to be seen. He does not have 360* view. [Weak]

Strong of body, strong of mind:
Edwin’s mind has been preserved through the raising process of undeath. The necromancer who raised him had done it immediately after he had gouged out his eyes and bled to death. While this did preserve SOME of his intelligence.. needless to say it wasn't much after the psychosis had deranged and corrupted his brain. Essentially, He has the intelligence of a below average human. [Medium]


Custom Inventory:

--------------------------------

--Battle Records--

Wins:
Ties:
Losses:

Battle Listing:

_________________
Death follows unbound, seeking purification.

Stop being the prisoner of your past, become the architect of your future.


Last edited by dtknight345 on Wed Oct 23, 2013 6:18 pm, edited 3 times in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 3:30 pm 
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Joined: Sun Oct 19, 2008 3:59 am
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even though you are counteracting the one racial with your medium skill, before the mods get on to look at your sheet it would probably be helpful for them if you posted your racials on your sheet.

also, creepy=checkmark

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 Post subject: Re: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 4:30 pm 
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Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2008 5:32 am
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He was all alone. There was no one to save him. He sat in the dark and shivered; with cold or fright he did not know. His doom was coming and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Just then, he heard it. That horrible squishing sound that preceded its arrival. Slowly his hand reached towards the light switch, his other gripping tight to cold steel. He wouldn't go down without a fight. The light flickered on and he let out a bloodcurdling scream, the last sounder ever made before death took him. All it had taken was a single glance upon the beast to stop his heart's rhythmic beating. A single glance at the horrible spaghetti monster.




Or at least that's what I assume you mean by 'reading creepy pastas'?

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 Post subject: Re: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 4:45 pm 
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No secrets for me in MW
No secrets for me in MW

Joined: Fri Jan 16, 2009 6:41 am
Posts: 455
Location: Palm Desert, Southern California.
At wolf, yes, that's what I mean by creepy pastas.. there's a facebook page that posted some good ones that really made me go wow, this is really creepy. And since then (Like a few months ago) I've been really interested in writing things like that.. but a little longer. A little more suspense. Give you something to want and to crave.. and then make you crap yourself.

Any other thoughts or advice on the character.. I'm open to anyone and everything :D

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Death follows unbound, seeking purification.

Stop being the prisoner of your past, become the architect of your future.


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 Post subject: Re: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 4:54 pm 
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Joined: Fri May 12, 2006 10:02 pm
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I've seen your post. Things are just crazy at work right now. I'll return w/ more thoughts later.

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 Post subject: Re: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Tue Oct 22, 2013 5:32 pm 
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No secrets for me in MW
No secrets for me in MW

Joined: Fri Jan 16, 2009 6:41 am
Posts: 455
Location: Palm Desert, Southern California.
Leboy, it sounds good, I was just making sure it was at least known, hah I understand how life gets. (:

Also, I edited in disadvantages/advantages and negation of one of them, made the page more aesthetically pleasing.

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Death follows unbound, seeking purification.

Stop being the prisoner of your past, become the architect of your future.


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 Post subject: Re: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 4:26 pm 
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When I see "Justicar", all I can think of is Mass Effect.

Since this is a caster class, there's not a lot to approve. Which is nice : ).

Akmun, our only long-standing fleshy, overcame his stupidity with a strong, I think. But you're not aiming for normal or above-average intelligence, so "Strong of Body, Strong of Mind" seems fine where it's at.

I don't see a bio here, but I'm assuming your character doesn't have eyes. If that's so, then we can let "The Sixth Sense" be as it is. Does he have to be facing the person to be able to sense them? Or can he "see" people with a 360-degree point of view? I'm inclined to only allow this skill if he is facing the person. Do you have plans to ever give Edwin eyes?

As for your pants and other 1g items, no, you can't sell them back for 1g. Nobody wants your pants. That's like trying to sell all the crappy, goblin daggers you find in a DnD campaign. So, I guess you could just douse them in gasoline and set them off in a blaze of glory for your first battle. Setting your clothes on fire and then fighting naked - that's bold.

Bottom line: Looks good. Approved.

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 Post subject: Re: Edwin DeVille, Undead Justicar (Pscionicist)
PostPosted: Wed Oct 23, 2013 6:13 pm 
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No secrets for me in MW
No secrets for me in MW

Joined: Fri Jan 16, 2009 6:41 am
Posts: 455
Location: Palm Desert, Southern California.
I had assumed you must be in a normal field of view in order to be seen, however I'll add this in for clarification.

Posting in members. Bio to be updated soon, just finished a bunch of midterms and studying so I plan on working on everything said to be worked on haha

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Stop being the prisoner of your past, become the architect of your future.


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